Smellyann Strikes Again

The First Weekend In June

I keep feeling like I had this unproductive weekend, because I didn't accomplish my singular goal at all, so here is a run-through of what I actually did do, to make myself feel better. And to share with you, because I know you hang on the edge of your seat, waiting for me to post these scintillating things I talk about, right?

First, like I mentioned, there was desire to paint in the wee hours of Saturday morning. Now. So I painted the pantry door. And the little bitty corner of wall next to it, which of course meant that more painting in the kitchen would need to happen, or else that little green section of wall would like mighty curious, all by itself.

Well, the real first first was making the pizza cake, from Friday night into the wee hours of Saturday morning. 

And the second thing, immediately after finishing the cake, was scooping up the leftover cake and frosting and constructing these cake pops. These are long since gone, sold right away, but like I (think I) posted yesterday, more can be made if you need parting gifts for Teacher, or a special graduate, or Dad, or, well, anybody, because I really don't care whom you give them to, as long as you buy some. Heh.

So the third thing, then, was painting the door.

I went back and forth all day Saturday after that, moving kitchen furniture (that would be the full baker's rack, the deep freezer, and the table and chairs), scrubbing sections of wall piece by piece, paint first, second, and the exasperatingly always-necessary third coat... and coming back here to play on Facebook and run my stupid Farmville. (I call it "stupid," but I really like it. It gives me a quick opportunity to take frequent breaks from whatever I'm doing, and I've always been a girl who likes taking frequent breaks. Maybe I do have ADHD, but that's how I manage it. Whatever. Moving on.)

As part of this parenting course we're doing right now (more on that later), Rob and I are each supposed to spend 10 minutes of true quality time with each of the kids, twice per day. So Sophia and I spent one of our ten-minute sessions painting the back of the kitchen wall. I did all the cutting in around the edges, and she painted in the middle. I guided her with the correct way to hold the brush and move it back and forth, back and forth, and then she went and did it her own way. Which is fine. You can lead a horse to water...

Chloë wanted a painting turn after that, too, so I spent another segment of quality time showing her the same things I'd shown Sophia. She did it more exactly like I showed her, because that is her way. She, being a Virgo like me, is quite a bit of a perfectionist. I am doing my best, now, seeing this, and knowing how difficult it is to be that way, to guide her away from that tendency. It's not easy. Anyway, so they helped me paint the walls.

Jack wanted to paint, too, but he was never available when I was ready for him, because he spent a great deal of the weekend outside with the neighbor kids, riding his bike, driving his Cadillac Escalade Power Wheels, using the girls' scooter, and generally getting dirty and having a ball. So I didn't force the 10 minutes on him, although I do think it's especially important that he and I connect for those 20 min per day. I'll work on it, getting it in.

So eventually, the bottom half of the kitchen got painted, as far as I could go without moving the refrigerator. Luckily, I have plenty of paint left, for whenever Rob gets around to helping me with that. (I tried, but I'm a weenie.)

In the eight-plus years we've lived here, the kitchen has always been at the top of my "gotta change this" list, but for some reason, it has escaped my ministrations thus far. I even have the paint for the top half. Well, now that we've had to keep the windows open all the time (no AC), the cats have scratched out half the screens in the house, and they've all but shredded the café curtains covering the kitchen windows. I hate it. And I hate the country-cottage-y wallpaper on the top half of the kitchen walls, too. That's fine and good, but I am just not a country-cottage-y type of person. I like bold, striking colors that pop. 

So I got up on the chairs and started to RRRRRRRRRIP the wallpaper off the walls, tossing big strips of it onto to floor, to the kids' shock and dismay. "Mom! What are you DOING?!" they demanded.

I just laughed and let their father explain. That's often the way things go around here. I laugh, and he's left to explain why.

I pulled off all the copper molds from around the top of the walls, too. I'm going to sell them. I collected them years ago, when we lived in Panama City, FL. And while I still absolutely adore copper - it's my favorite precious metal - it's just not the look I'm going for anymore. So they have to go. I don't have them listed anywhere yet, but I do have some interest. Let me know if you, too, want to stake a claim. I'm willing to break up the lot.

Because we didn't get Rob's Navy paycheck the first of the month and things are uncomfortably tight right now, and also because I'm trying to walk more and drive less in the interest of Saving The Planet, Chloë and I walked to the grocery store late Saturday evening. The kids were begging, crying, for milk, so I decided to break down and spend some of our very little money on a gallon. I mean, it's milk, and they're kids. Not exactly a luxury. 

Chloë and I had the best talk on our way to and from the store. We discussed physical beauty and why that might not be the most important thing about a person, and what things might be more important. She decided that being healthy was the most important thing, and being safe, so we talked about ways she could be healthy and safe. She came up with lots of fantastic answers, like eating junk foods in moderation, always wearing her helmet when she rides her bike or scooter, and getting the proper amount of sleep. I was impressed.

At the store, she "helped" me shop, and by that, I mean she pushed the little cart around and mostly observed as I made decisions about what to buy and what to leave at the store. We talked about the importance of shopping the perimeter - she remembered what "perimeter" meant from her studies in math - and, like eating junk food, using the processed foods in the center aisles in moderation. I had decided to make a Key Lime Pie for dessert, to use up the Key Limes I'd picked up at a roadside citrus stand in Florida a few weeks ago, so we bought the condensed milk and graham crackers I needed for that, comparing prices-per-unit and all that we always try to do.

And since I have a partially-made batch of hummus in the freezer, I decided that I should get a lemon or two (of which there were none, so I'm going to try Key Lime hummus instead!) and the tahini I need to finish it. We spent about six years looking for the damn tahini, which used to be much easier to find, back when they had a separate section for "health foods." (Now it's next to the mayonnaise and other condiments, in case you're wondering.)

Having "gone green" by walking to the store instead of driving, I'd have felt pretty crappy about getting one of those God-awful plastic grocery bags in which to lug our loot home, so I bought yet another 99¢ canvas bag, too. I just can't stand those plastic bags. They, among other things like inconsiderate smokers, people who drink copious amounts of bottled water and don't even recycle the bottles, and folks who take nine hours to make the right turn in front of me, are the absolute bane of my existence.

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So we walked home, me lugging the bag full of milk-and-schtuff, and continued our nice, Mom-to-Daughter talk. Somehow it morphed into what life will be like as she eases into her teenage years, and how it's natural for girls to butt heads with their mothers frequently in those times. That really upset her. I made her promise to remember one thing: that no matter what she said or did, and no matter what I said or did, I would always love her more than she could understand until she was a mother herself. That eased her mind a bit.

Then that translated into a conversation about the pressures of being a teen and experimenting with things like drugs, alcohol, smoking, and sex. I told her my hopes and expectations, and she asked good questions. Overall, it was a very productive conversation, and I'm so delighted we had the chance to have it.

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So we got home, and I made the pie, and oh, my word, it was freaking delicious. Beyond expectations. I still have plenty of Key Limes, so I plan to bring another pie to our Gardening club this Thursday. Assuming I still have the gas to get there. Jack didn't like the pie, but everyone else devoured it with gusto. I had way more than I had any business having, but after cheesecake, Key Lime Pie has to be my fav... well, no, there's Dutch Apple Cream Pie, and Chocolate Chip Cookies, and... Uh. I just love sweets. I'm in the right business, I think. (And I'm glad I've discovered the power of prunes to help me take off any extra weight I might gain from sampling my own wares! Phooo, do those work well. Golly. *ahem*)

So that was Saturday.

Sunday, we didn't make it to church either, which was sad, especially since I'd visited their food pantry on Thursday after Girl Scouts, and they serviced us quite nicely. (That's something I've never done before in my life, and it's quite humbling. Thank you, to any and all of you who donate to the Food Bank. We haven't needed it before, but with this paycheck snafu, I'm certainly glad it's there for us in this time of need. Now if only there were a Gas Pantry, eh?)

I napped a lot on Sunday. Rob napped a lot, and Sophia did, too. The other two mostly watched Nova shows on the Wii, from Netflix. Jack is especially fond of the Nova programs, and particularly the ones that feed his transportation and mechanically-oriented brain. He'll watch the same ones about plane crashes or rockets taking off over and over, always going upstairs to get a toy that goes along with the program, and making-believe he's part of the action. It's pretty cool. Rob gets a huge kick out of his doing that.

For my evening 10-minute session with Sophia, she just wanted to play with the discarded boxes I'm trying to get rid of on Freecycle. She's decided she needs them for her tiny toys instead, like finger puppets and the Squinkies a friend gave her at her birthday party in April. Here she is admiring the bunk bed she made for her bunny finger puppet.

This is her favorite box, though, because "it's the biggest, and it has a window, so I can see what they're doing in there." She asked me to punch holes in the window with my knitting needle, so her bunny could breathe. And so I did, until she told me, "enough."

While Sophia had been napping earlier, I got started training Jack and Chloë on the way we do laundry, from beginning to end. They collected all the laundry in the house, sorted it into the proper piles, learned how to run the washer and the dryer, and then I showed them how to fold their own clothes. For now, I'll leave it at that, until I feel they're ready to start folding Mom & Dad's, and the towels and sheets. I've just always done the laundry myself and only had them run and put away their things. But with the parenting course, I see the error of my ways. I don't know why I didn't, but I guess I figured they would just pick it up eventually. Foolish. So now I'll be working on their "training," and we don't call them "chores" but rather "contributions." It's working out well. They feel important and significant, and Jack even commented that doing the laundry was "fun." (Not to me, but to his big sister. No way he'd let me hear such a thing on purpose!)

After dinner, when I wanted some knitting time on my sparkle! dress, and Chloë wanted a break from folding laundry, I asked her to spend a little quality time herself with Sophia. The two of them have been fighting a lot again lately, so I asked Chloë read Sophia some stories. She grumped and grumbled about it at first, but in the end, she read three stories to Soap without me asking her to go past the first one. And I made lots of progress on my dress:

Pretty soon, I'll be at the placket, which is my new favorite word to say. I can't wait to finish the front.

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Jack went to bed first tonight, so again, I didn't really get to spend my QT with him. I'll give him extra tomorrow. After story time between the girls, Chloë wanted her ten minutes with me. Sophia and Dad spent those ten minutes together, too, playing and Soph telling cute, six-year-old stories to her Daddy. Chloë and I went for a moonlit walk around the smaller lake.

I took the Nikon along, just in case I found anything cool to take a picture of, but most of my pictures didn't turn out. I liked the way these branches stuck out far into the light of the street lamp, so I snapped it.

Halfway 'round the lake, I spotted a "frog" hopping off the path, toward the water. I managed to catch it for Chloë, who immediately squealed when she felt it and dropped him. So I caught him again, and then, of course, I could see it was really a toad and not a frog at all. We agreed to bring him home to show Daddy and Sophia. We took turns holding him and talking about what we learned months ago when we covered Amphibians, about the differences between frogs and toads. Chloë surprised me by remembering quite a lot of them without my prompting her, and I felt a lot of pride inside me.

There were a lot of ducks and drakes pairing up along our walk, but those photos didn't come out. I'm glad this one of Mama and her four ducklings did, though - how cute are they?! I just adore baby aminals of all flavors and varieties. I'm definitely a Woman in that regard. Baby people, baby ducks, baby anything, and my heart melts.

Chloë could barely wait to burst in the front door and show them the toad. We had to shh-shh-shh her, because the windows are open, and our neighbors sleep early. Of course, they gave her all the attention she was due, and there was even more fun when Sophia, holding the poor toad, dropped him in the house. I was in the powder room when that happened, but the sounds of them all gadding about, trying to catch it, were amusing to hear.

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Chloë went to bed shortly after that - no, she had her ten minutes of Dad time first, and they looked through an American Baby magazine together, of all things - and Sophia and I shared some more time while I knit. She drew pictures of different things, like Chloë and I taking a walk, and of an "alien monster mouth" coming out of the sky and eating our entire unsuspecting family. I'm not really worried about that one, since she was giggling while she told me what it was. Sophia loves to color and draw, and she has become quite good at it, actually. I'll have to show you some of her drawings next time.

For now, though, I'm going to wrap up my weekend by trying to knit at least to the placket and making my To-Do list for the coming week.  I hope yours is a good one.

Fin.

Britto 'N' Burpee Love

Or should I say "Burpee 'n' Britto"?

Anyway, here's what I'm talkin' 'bout:

I happened across this luggage collection at Heys USA via OK! Magazine. (Why I get that magazine, I don't know, but it was free, so hey. And it seems to be the only one I make time for lately, out of all my subscriptions - free and otherwise - so... okay!)

Thee luggage ist drool-worthy, no? I am coveting it.

For those who don't know, Rob and I bought one of Romero Britto's works of art on our European cruise two years ago, so this was quite cool to see. If I could afford a $300 piece of loogage, I would definitely snatch one or four pieces right up!

(My birthday's in September, if you're reading this, Mr. Trump.)

As for the Burpee love...

our seedy seedies arrived today! Pretty colorful, huh? Compared the Britto, these packages kind of put me to sleep.

But that's okay, because the goodness contained within will brighten up our backyard this summer, with the bright red tomatoes, purple peppers, yellow squash, orange carrots and... so much more.

I can't wait!

(Mr. Trump, I need some money for the wood for our raised beds, the soil, some tools, a compost bin... all in the name of education, you know.)

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Not a particularly exciting day in Casa de Odette, I'm afraid. But that won't keep me from sharing all the details that I know you love so much. Both of you.

Someone on Freecycle posted 7 boxes of Annie's organic mac & cheese, so you know I snatched those babies right up! Even better, she lived right around the corner from us. Rob made some for the kids for dinner tonight. The girls LOVED it and Jack, who rarely loves any food that doesn't have sugar as its frst four ingredients, said he prefered the 'dark orange stuff instead.' Two out of three ain't bad.

Speaking of organic (because I never do that), Jack and I went on a leetle shopping spree at Harris Teeter today. The sales start on Wednesdays, so I took a look-see to figure out what they might have on sale that's actually organic. I think there were TWO things in the whole ad, which was sucktastic. But we were out of milk (because some unknown elf left out an ENTIRE half-gallon of organic leche, which made me want to weep), and Jack doesn't like his oatmeal prepared with water. Oatmeal snob! I had a bunch of coupons from Organc Valley's website, and a few others for organic stuff, so I figured we might as well go see what was to be had.

I bought about $72 worth of stuff for $50 with my coupons, which isn't too bad for organic. We picked up something like four half-gallons of milk, some cheese, yogurt, the above pizzas (I had some of the Spinach Feta for dinner, and it was okay, but weirdly spicy), and some chocolate ice cream. That shit was good!! I had about four small bites, and while I wanted more, I didn't really feel like summoning the Dumping Syndrome fairies, so I let it be.

I'm still enjoying this organic mess, though. It's expensive, but that'll be another challenge for me to overcome: finding room in our budget to eat all local, all organic, all the time. With Burpee's help, we should do just fine.

Or we'll starve to death.

You'll see.

I got all of this knitting done tonight, between dance class and sitting with my two "we're not sleepy" imps who fell asleep within minutes after I started playing the Hans Christian Andersen fairy tales on Audiobook for them, courtesy of my iPhone. Well, except for the first two rows, which I did during dance class last night. (Would have been more, but I messed up the count and had to frog and restart.)

I'm not sure I'm loving this project. I don't even think I have enough yarn to finish it, but that actually adds to the excitement for me. Will she or won't she? Only one way to find out. (Okay, there's more than one way to find out, but I prefer to fly by the seat of my pants on these things.) Just in case, I'm keeping every last inch of my snippings, in case I need them!

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See those pants I'm wearing? They're jammies, and I think it embarrasses the hell out of Chloë that I wore them to the bus stop. But that's beside the point. The point is, I bought them around Halloween '09 (hence the skulls), and I could not get them up past my thighs at that point. Now, they not only fit, but they are loose-ish and very comfy!

AND

with them, I'm wearing one of Rob's size M Harley t-shirts, just because I can. I think he likes it. I know he likes it, actually, when his girl wears his shirts, so I'm excited that for the first time ever, I can!

AND

just for kicks, I put on a pair of his zip-and-button-up shorts - no elastic in the waist - while I was doing laundry today, and I could button them!!! I had to shove my saggy belly all down in there to do it, but hello! Have you seen my husband? He is a very thin man!

AND

While wearing this ensemble, I went out to get the mail, and a neighbor across the street called out, "Are you on a diet? You've gotten so skinny!"

SKINNY!!!!!!

So yeah, I'm all full of my SKINNY self at the moment, thankyouverymuch.

And on that note, I have shop reports to do.

Fin. 

P.S. Oh yeah. Rob took Jack to see the doc at the ADHD therapy clinic, you know, where Chloë goes? To see about the pediatrician's diagnoses of ADHD and ODD. The doc pretty much observed him for the hour and questioned Rob, and then summed it up with, "So why are you here?" In other words, he has neither, in that doc's opinion. We're going to go with that one. Joy!

P.P.S. The girls and I went to the library tonight after dinner. Sophia got her own library card and picked the first three books off the shelf to borrow. Chloë picked three more chapter books (she finished two in a week, so I figured she could handle a third this time), and I picked three more books related to teaching and homeschooling. Never mind that I still haven't read the last three. Never mind, I said!

 

Things On My Mind

So I'm behind again; what else is new?

There has been lots going on.

Of course, as usual, I have been driving myself crazy with the mystery shopping. I did get a new shirt out of that, though, and I've had a couple high-paying ones that were worth the incredibly boring effort.

I went and had my Quick Start training for being Sophie's Daisy Scout troop leader next year. I learned a lot and feel much more prepared to begin that endeavor, even while simultaneously beginning to homeschool the three kids. I will feel even better after I pick up my Leader guide. Kim, the trainer, gave me lots of good hints and tips for running the troop smoothly.

She (Kim) also has a very petite daughter, so when she saw Chloe Friday night at the "She and Me" pre-registration event for next year, and Chloe introduced herself as a rising Junior Girl Scout, she offered to break out her daughter's old Junior petite uniform and pass it along to me. Great! Any way to save a buck.

On the one hand, I want to save each uniform especially for the girl who wore it and earned all the patches, but on the other hand, in order to save money, I ripped all the Daisy petals off Chloe's Daisy uniform so that Sophia can wear it.  From now on, now that I know the girls will have lots of patches sewn on, I won't do that anymore. But I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth; if she wants to pass on the old Junior uniform, who am I to say no?

Speaking of that She and Me event, who can resist laughing at this picture of Sophia clowning for the camera:

I dare you to try. Every time I look at it, I can't help but grin, at least!

The event was lots of fun. The girls made lotions (cherry and orange), painted a clay magnet, strung beads for bracelets and necklaces, colored pictures, made tissue paper flowers, and more. I have lots of pictures - too many to post here. As it was the beginning of Sophia's Scouting journey, of course I had to bring the camera.

Unfortunately, that meant there was no camera for Rob to take along to Jack's Cub Scout sleepover at the Sports Hall of Fame in Portsmouth. Rob and Jack spent the night there on Friday with the pack. I heard it was lots of fun. There was a scavenger hunt. That's about all I know, since Rob's iPhone battery died, and he didn't even get i-pics of the event. Suck.

Also, in case you haven't been reading the Sweet Pea Academy blog, Friday was Jack's first official day as a home-schooler! I pulled him out after, well, you can go read it for yourself if you're interested. Cute pictures there of him making pancakes, too.

So naturally, home-schooling has been at the forefront of my consciousness just about constantly lately.  I'm not going to do a whole lot with the boy, aside from get him tested to gauge his baseline for right now. We'll take the rest of the year pretty easy and do fun things together with his daddy, and then start up again in August or September when the girls are ready to join us. That will take a lot of pressure of me for coming up with a last-minute curriculum, which is a huge relief.

In the meantime, I have made up Sweet Pea Academy ID cards for Rob and myself, as home educators, and for Jack, as a student. Then we can use those cards for teacher discounts at TAPS, Michaels, AC Moore, Barnes & Noble, etc. They're pretty cute, too (the cards). I like 'em.

So what else...

Oh, so the kids went to the Lowe's Build and Grow Clinic Saturday with Rob, to build a Mother's Day trellis planter. They each made one, and they all had a FANTASTIC time. It's a really cool program, if you haven't heard of it. Both Lowe's and Home Depot run these workshops for kids, teaching them all kinds of skills and making lots of projects. I've known about it for a long time, but this is the first one I actually signed them up for because I have no clue why. They can't wait to go again, though. The next one is in two weeks, and they're going to build a catapult! I don't think HD is running any this month, at least not here.

Also on Saturday, there was a big drawing at the local mall for a big package that I desperately wanted to win: a fitness package, spa package, and MAID SERVICE!!! All to one person. Oh, how I needed that. I came close, too. Chuck from the Morning Point (the radio station I often listen to) chose a paper and said, "Does anyone have a first name that starts with "M"? Do you live in Virginia Beach?" But alas, it was another M in VB. 

I did win a small garden prize, though. They had a separate game, a roulette wheel-type thing, and I put my piece on Kelly Clarkson. KC came up when the wheel was spun! I didn't know what I won, but of course, I was all full of the glee and stuff. It turned out to be some nice gardening gloves and a hat, and blueberry soap. The girls were with me, and they were even more excited than I was. They took our picture, but I don't know if it's going to be on the radio's website or what; a quick search there turned up nothing. Let me know if you spot us!

Hm, so on Thursday, Chloe went to her weekly therapy session. L called me in for the session, too. She wanted to talk about a picture Chlo had drawn the week before. I don't want to get too far into Chlo's psyche here, but let's just say that there were some very strong feelings about Robby, babies dying, and such. I was absolutely in tears. I felt terrible that she's having any kind of hard time with that. I guess all these years, I have been focusing on how Jack is going to grow up feeling about losing his twin, and I just haven't worried too much about any impact on Chloe for losing her baby brother. Or Sophia, for that matter. They've always been free to talk about him, but ... I don't know. It just took me a bit by surprise. I feel kind of stupid about that, now.

So there is a lot of anxiety on her part. We are supposed to make her feel as comfortable and safe as possible, and give her as much control as we can. Those anxious feelings can masquerade as ADHD, too. L was surprised when I told her we took Chlo off the med, but she didn't seem to have too much of a problem with it, like her pediatrician did. But I don't want to get into that again, right now.

Saturday night, we watched "The Business of Being Born" with the kids. That may surprise some people who think that kids that young have no business learning and seeing so much about human birth, but I honestly have zero problems with it, especially when it's done as tastefully as in that doc. It's nature, it's biology, and I am a very strong proponent of being completely honest with your kids, as long as that honesty doesn't harm them in any way. Half the time, they were bored watching it. They have had SO many questions - especially the girls - about giving birth lately, that I thought it would be helpful for them to see that, in fact, most babies are NOT cut out of their mothers' bellies and are delivered in a much less scary way. (Holy run-on.) I think it helped. Hard to say. Sophia still thinks babies all come by c-section, I think, but she also realizes that they are born vaginally, too. I don't think she quite gets it yet.

And of course, I was impacted by the movie, too. So was Rob. I feel strongly that anyone who is pregnant or thinking about it should watch this doc. I can't say for certain that things would have gone any differently for us (I had two emergency and one "emergent" c-sections), but I know that I would have started out, at least, with a midwife and a planned home birth if I knew what things were really like in the OB world. I thought I needed an OB/GYN because I wanted "someone who knew what they were doing" or something like that. Ha! I feel the fool for feeling that way about it, but what did I know. I was 24, scared and clueless.

There's little I can change about the horrible way my births went, but there is a lot I can change about the way my family eats. On my own, I also watched "Food, Inc.," a documentary about, well, the food industry in America, especially farming. I feel even more strongly than ever about changing our diets to reflect my/our concern for the environment, our health and nutrition, and the world in general. I can't wait to get that garden planted, so we can eat fresh food straight from our backyard. Whatever we can't grow ourselves, I want to supplement from the Farmer's Market (as much as possible) and the organic section of the grocery (as little as possible). I know it will cost, but hopefully the money we save on growing our own produce will offset the cost of buying non-genetically modified milk, for instance.  I definitely recommend y'all watch this one, too.

And I don't plan to let my kids eat another hamburger or pork chop. Certainly not from McDonald's or, say, Sonic. No more fast food, and no more fast food mystery shops. Rob will probably balk, but I'm going to stand firm on that. I'll probably let the kids watch Food, Inc. when the disk comes in the mail from Netflix, so we can talk about exactly why I want to implement these changes in our diets; it really wasn't that grotesque or anything like that. I didn't find it to be too graphic at all, and I was watching it from their standpoint the whole time.

It makes me more eager than ever to get out of this house and get a place on a nice lot, where we can maybe have a goat and some chickens, too. Fresh eggs! Fresh milk! It would be grand, so nice. If the boat plan doesn't happen for now, I definitely want to move out of here as soon as possible. We planned on being here about five years, and it's been over seven now. I hate it!! The house is to small (it's a townhouse), our neighbors are right on top of us, and forget about the nitpicky homeowner's association that drives us crazy.  I dream of living where Nikki lives, Chloe's troop leader - it's exactly the kind of place I want. A sprawling ranch with a huge yard and a garage... sigh. Maybe. Maybe.

Well, I could say a thousand more things, but I really must get this desk cleaned up.

Oh! One more thing before I forget:

I finished Luke's wool shorties for Stephanie. I started them about two weeks ago, but she commissioned me for them literally months ago, maybe even before he was born! So it's about dang time I got them done. I didn't do a drawstring, but that will be quickie-quick. I just don't know if she wants one yet, or what kind or color she'd want. But yay! Cute, right? I hope they fit, since they were custom-made to his measurements.

I guess that's it. Happy Mother's Day to all you moms and grandmas out there!

Fin. 

P.S. I watched Revolutionary Road, too, with Leo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet. Have you seen it? It was good, but it was no Titanic! Quite the opposite, quite quite.

Ready, Set, Go!

This picture is for Stephanie, who requested a Work In Progress pic of the shorties I'm making for Luke. So here ya go, Steph! They look huge to me.  Hopefully they'll fit... do you like so far? I'm planning on working on them a bunch tonight, so maybe another update pic tomorrow if I do.  

So let's see... this afternoon, I picked up all three kids from school for what was supposed to be a comprehensive ADHD evaluation of Jack and Chloë. I got Sophia too, because I didn't think Rob would wake up to get her off the bus, and I didn't think I'd be home in time, since it was supposed to last an hour and a half.

Ha. 

Hahaha.

Dr. P. spent less than a half-hour with both kids, total. And when I say "with the kids," I really mean just talking to me, barely acknowledging them except to say, "Don't touch that. Don't touch that." He didn't look them over, he didn't question them, he didn't really observe them. He asked me to check off symptoms on a checklist, and he questioned me very briefly about their habits and history. Then he told me, based on pulling it out of his ass that minimal information, to increase both of their doses of Adderall!

What?!

REALLY?

I don't understand why. I certainly did not need his "expertise" for such aggressive medical action on a disorder I'm not even sure either of them have, especially Chloë. He tried to convince me that they have it, but I disagree. I'm annoyed. I'm irritated. I'm agitated. I'm frustrated.

No, I don't see much difference in their behavior since going on the meds a week ago, but truly, I am not entirely sure there is such a problem. Jack's kindergarten teacher never mentioned these issues that are suddenly exasperating for his first grade teacher. Like my sister pointed out, he was an early preemie, he has had his fair share of problems and delays, and maybe he just needs a little more time, a little more coaxing, because he is such a little guy. Neither of us (she or me) would have labeled them as having ADHD ourselves, based on our own observations. Rather, we would have chosen to label them as "kids."

I watch my kids closely. I would say I can be hypervigilant when it comes to their various behaviors. I observe them when they're with their peers. Do I think they're out of control? Do I think they are more active than kids their ages? Do I think they need medication? No, no, and NO.

And I certainly don't think we need to go all increasing the dose, willy-nilly, based on a few minutes of questioning the mother. I am going to go the therapy route instead. I do not want to dope up my children. If there are problems, if there are issues with their behavior, I would rather suss out exactly what they are, than just dump them in a box labeled "ADHD" because that seems to be the easiest explanation. Through therapy, we can all learn coping mechanisms and stress relief techniques.

No. No more medicine. I'm done. I'm through. It's enough.

Phew.

What a relief. I'm glad that is decided. You may disagree with me, and that is fine, but know this: I am positive I am doing what is best for my children and our family.

********

After the girls came home from dance and I finished working on my coupons for Harris Teeter (see prior post on my awesome savings!), I worked more on the whole homeschooling thing. I've been doing research. It's not enough, but it's a start. I'm pretty sure I'm going to buy the $200 Hooked on Phonics program for Jack and Sophia, for their beginning and emerging reading skills. Also, I am certain I want to use the Math-U-See program for all of them for mathematics. A friend recommended it, and it gets lots of great reviews on all the homeschooling review sites. I don't know yet where we'll find the money for these programs, but if it comes down to buying materials for our homeschool or having my abdominoplasty, I guess I'm going to suck it up and not have the surgery. The idea saddens me, but the kids' needs definitely come first.

Boohoo for me, but yay for them!

I'm thinking about taking in a baby or two for daycare. It will bring in some much-needed extra money, I can still do that and homeschool, and ... and Rob just texted me, so now I've forgotten what I was going to say! The subbing thing just hasn't worked out as planned. I don't get called when I am available, and when they do call, I can't take the job because they want me to start at, like, 0700. I don't get the kids on the bus until 0800, so it just doesn't work, with Rob's hours. Bah. Frustrating, but whatcha gonna do??

Oh, and I've submitted my letter of intent to homeschool to the city, as well as a rudimentary curriculum based on what I blogged about earlier. It's in the mail! That's it! We're homeschoolers! Well. Almost...

So now, I'm going to do my online orientation for being a Girl Scout Leader, so I can proceed to the next training step(s). I want to get all my ducks in a row as early as I can. I've always been like that. I want to get things done ahead of time. I like to follow a plan. I can be quite spontaneous, but with a plan in place, I feel more comfortable and prepared.

'Evening, then!

Fin.

P.S. Also for arts instruction, I can teach them cross-stitching/embroidery, and we can learn more together about that and sewing! That will be fun. And, I thought, maybe we can get a big world map and put pins in it every day when we see where the clothes we're wearing were made, and maybe even where our food came from (if not local). That will open a discussion about the various countries of the world, for further exploration. What do you think?

Just Another Manic Monday

So, I stayed up all night again last night, Sunday into Monday, so I could work on my coupons, of all things. I haven't opened the paper in three weeks, and since it's almost the end of the month, I needed to work on the database if I was going to have a chance of winning that $25 Amazon.com gift certificate for April! I hope I get it again... it definitely helps!

The plan had been to work on coupons on Sunday and laundry on Monday, but it didn't quite work out that way. Other than taking Sophia to her classmate's birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese (deja vu!) on Sunday, I mostly slept. Don't know what's up with that, I've just been so tired. Between that and a wee-hours cup of coffee, I was well primed for another all-nighter. It seems like I do it once or twice a week lately. Sucks, but like Stephanie said, it's better than every night like I used to do!

 

I spent over an hour on the phone with my dad in the morning, hearing about his and Wife's honeymoon cruise, his first visit with my grandpa since my sister's wedding, his extensive home repair woes, yadda yadda. When he asked me what was new, I hesitantly told him about the kids' ADHD diagnoses and our plans to homeschool next year. He's VERY outspoken and not at all crunchy or anything like that, so I thought he would not approve... but he did and said he was proud of me! I don't live for my dad's praise or anything, but it comes so rarely that I'll take it when I can get it. He was all for the homeschooling thing, which shocked the crap out of me, but especially when I told him it was an alternative to keeping them in school and medicating them.

 

Around noon or so, I got up (yes, I worked on coupons for, like, 12 hours! But I wasted plenty of that time doing other things, too) to get ready to go to court. Today was my appearance for my naughty doggy's "dog at large" charge from last month, when Tiger Lily escaped the yard and had a nice time roaming the neighborhood until someone called Animal Control. Did I tell you about that? I had planned to fight the fine, since it had never happened before and hopefully won't happen again. She's licensed, microchipped, rabies-vaxed, and we pick up after her when she poops around the neighborhood. In other words, we're pretty responsible pet owners, and I was hoping for leniency based on that fact.

I was nervous. I dressed in a new skirt (I never mentioned that I went on a shopping spree at Old Navy after Sophia's birthday party last weekend. Everything is a size medium! I bought mostly size 14 bottoms, but 12s fit, and I should be down to at least a 10 after my abdominoplasty. And dare I say I could probably have fit into some 'small' tops, too. Exciting!) and tank top with matching sweater. I carefully did my make-up, hair, and put on jewelry. I wanted to look proper and responsible for the court.

At the court, I was chagrined to find I could bring in neither my cell phone nor my knitting. I had to trek back to my van in heels to put all my stuff back. By the time I got back in and found my courtroom - in criminal court, no less! - it was already time to go in. 

The judge was quite stern. When he was first addressing us, the peanut gallery, I was thinking, "Oh, Lordy, I'ma goin' to jail!" And then after the two people stepped up to ask for continuances in their cases, I was the first person called! I tried not to be nervous, but the judge had just yelled at the previous guy for talking too much, and I didn't want to make the same mistake. 

The animal control officer who had captured Tiger Lily and issued my citation, or whatever it is, was there. She stepped up to the bench with me and explained the case. The judge asked me, "How do you plea?" and I said, "Uh... not guilty?" He was not amused. He raised his eyebrows and looked down his nose at me, and then I said, "Your honor, I would like to ask for leniency. This has never happened before or since."  And blah blah blah, I gave the rest of my reasons. He looked at the AC officer, who basically pled my case for me, telling him I had no priors and that I was very cooperative, etc. He asked her if he should give me the benefit of the doubt this time, she nodded, and he spat out, "Your case is dismissed!"

I just stood there for a second and then asked, "Okay... do I just leave now?" "Yep!" replied the judge. I thanked him quietly, nodded at the officer, and high-tailed it out of there with a big grin on my face. It was all I could do not to kick up my heels and whoop out in the hallway!

Once in the car, I called Rob and my dad to share the good news about my dismissal - and, I'd like to add, I wasn't even the one who let the dang dog out in the first place!! I drove home and worked on laundry for an hour or so. I was so caught up with laundry so very recently, that it amazes me how far behind I am on it again already. It's ridiculous, the amount of clothes we go through. I can't stand it! But it's even worse now that I'm both changing over the kids' wardrobes to Spring/Summer and putting away Fall/Winter, as well as getting rid of all my Large/size 18 clothes and putting in all the new stuff I just got. Clothes, clothes, everywhere, and not a stitch to wear! Heh.

Anyway. Rob was supposed to go down to the bus stop to get the kids, but he fell asleep, so I had to race down to the corner at top speed to meet the bus. Just in time! All three kids bounced happily off the bus; they'd had good days. Rare for all three to have one at the same time.

Rob and I canoodled for a little while, while the kids cleaned up their rooms a little bit, and then I finally fell asleep. Just for a couple hours; I woke up just as Rob was taking Jack and Sophie to The Boy's Cub Scout den meeting. Chloë stayed home with me, to work on homework and then study for the Virginia SOL tests coming up next month. We have been really lax about working on that, and now that we're going to homeschool, I care even less... but I would like to see her do well.

When Rob and Crew returned home at 2015, Chloë and I whizzed over to the library. While she studied, I was reading up on homeschooling stuff online. There is just SO much stuff out there, I keep getting overwhelmed. I just don't feel like I know where to start. So I wanted to go check out a few books on the subject, to give me a little more focus. I found one on getting started in homeschooling, though not the one by Rebecca Rupp that I was hoping to find (maybe I'll get that on Amazon if I win that GC?), and another on homeschooling kids with special needs, and a third on what kids should know at each age and stage.

Chloë checked out a few books, too, and then we picked out an audiobook for the kids to listen to whenever there's time. We chose Little House on the Prairie, which I loved to read as a young girl her age. I couldn't find any audiobooks I was interested in there, but I'd like to listen to some while I do my knitting and such. I know I can download more from the library's website, so I'll have a look-see later to see what I can find. Have you ever listened to an audiobook? Do you like it?

Upon our return, I found Rob in the kitchen, cleaning up and cooking dinner. I had thought he'd already fed the kids before Cub Scouts, but apparently not! It smelled wonderful, but it was going to be a while, so I started the kids in on their audiobook. They sat around behind me in chairs and cuddled up on the floor in blankets, listening to the story with various levels of interest. I'm not sure Sophia is into it, but I caught Chloë reading one of the books she checked out when she was supposed to be listening, so... I'm not sure it will hold their interest!

Oh, before I went to the library, I talked a little bit with the kids about homeschooling next year, and what they want to learn. Sophia, no surprise, wants to learn more about birds. I told her I'd send her to her grandma. Next! (I jest.) Chloë wanted to focus on art and music (eek!), and learn more about taking care of animals. Jack wanted to learn about cars and boats. Shocker! That will all be fun; we can definitely do that. I just can't wait!!

I plan to be semi-structured with homeschooling. I want Sophia to learn to read more - she's definitely ready - over the course of the next year, and I want Jack to improve drastically. I will work on all the core subjects, but we will also have things like Field Trip Friday (maybe, I don't want to be too rigid about that), Library Day, etc. 

Also, I want to take a whole different approach to our eating style. I'm all into the environment, and yet I don't practice what I preach where food is concerned. As we use up the stockpile that I developed mostly in February, I want to replace those over-processed, "fakey" foods with natural, sometimes organic (but I'm not a stickler) and definitely local foods. Eating local is very important to me. We'll hit the Farmer's Market as often as we can, getting fresh meats and seafoods, produce - and there's even an organic market there, too. We'll go to the berry fields and pick our own, as well as beans and whatever else I can find. I want to learn to freeze and can our produce, and eat what's in season locally as much as possible. I'm way excited about the prospect. It will not only be great for the environment, but it'll be much better nutrition and might help with the kids' ADHD-whatever thing, as well. And surely, it'll be much more delicious than something out of a box, right?

Rob suddenly remembered that he had to go to work, leaving me to finish dinner while the kids listened to their story. D'oh! He jumped up and left, quick, fast and in a hurry. I miss him already. The kids ate well, and then I sent them off to bed, quite late. Quite late.

I'm all amped up about homeschooling right now. I feel like, with another cup of coffee, I could stay up all night researching it some more! I kid, I kid.

In the morning, Sophia's supposed to stay home with me and then go in at 0900 and register for kindergarten... but guess what? We're going to march in there and inform them of our intent to homeschool, instead! I'm sure they'll be surprised, since I had originally told them it would just be Jack.

This homeschooling thing is going to be So. Much. Fun. I can't wait!

Fin. 
  

 

 

Friday Fragments

Link up with Mrs. 4444 if you're fragmenting today!

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This has been another crazy-busy week, so I'm going to combine my Friday Fragments post with an update of what's been going on and what's to come...

Yesterday, I had to cancel most of my plans, because I had a terrible migraine all day. I slept most of it off, since I hate the way my migraine meds make me feel. Tylenol helped me get through the rest, but it's not enough. Maybe I should go back to the headache clinic and get something else.

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Jack had his ultrasound to look for, um, his missing right testis yesterday. His dad picked him from school and took him to that, so I don't kow all the details other than that they found it and it looks like the blood flow to the area is normal. That's the important stuff, anyway, right? So here's to hopefully having healthy grandchildren... in at least 20 years!

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I finally got out of the house after school yesterday to take Chloë to her Brownies meeting. It was an extra meeting, to make swaps for the girls' upcoming encampment. They made things like mini (fake) S'mores, camp-in-a-bag, and other cute things. Pretty cool stuff. I was disappointed to learn that one girl who has been in the same troop with Chloë for the past four years is dropping out after this year, to make room for other activities, but this is what happens when kids get older, I guess.

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Oh yeah, and Rob took Jack to his Pack meeting last night. He moved up to Tiger level, and got a new patch and pin! I was sorry to miss that, since the Bobcat promotion was so fun. But yay, Jack!

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Wednesday was a busy day. I went out to lunch for a mystery shop with Stephanie and her sweet, 6mo baby Luke. I can't believe that cutie is half a year old already! Time sure flies... The food was good, but our server was a dud. I have yet to do that report, oops. They'll probably yell at me for it, but exhaustion and headaches to make for good report-writing. I'll get on that right after this!

After lunch, Steph and I picked up Chloë from school, to take her to her therapy appointment. Then we went home to meet Jack and Sophia coming off the bus, before whisking them off to two hours of dance classes. The kids and I played with little Luke in the car, while his mama caught a wee nap in the backseat. I was glad she did. And finally, we went to Wal-mart afterward to pick up the kids' glasses. All three are wearing them now:

 

Sophia's are my favorite. She's still learning to keep them on her face and not play with them, so I imagine they may be broken within a week! Hopefully not... but it wouldn't surprise me.

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Wednesday morning, I saw my own prescribing doc and asked him whether he does ADHD meds for the kids, since both Jack and Chloë were diagnosed and given Adderall on Monday. After a lengthy conversation about who diagnosed them and how, etc., he scheduled them to come in next week for a much more comprehensive psychological evaluation, in order to more properly diagnose both the ADHD and Jack's apparent ODD. I feel much more comfortable with that plan, although we did start giving the Adderall yesterday morning. Chloë says it helps her, but I'm waiting to see what her teachers say. And Jack's, since I just got a note home about his behavior, for the billionth time this year, on Tuesday.

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Oh. So the plan is now that I'm going to be homeschooling both Jack and Chloë next year, while Sophia goes to half-day kindergarten at the school. I'd planned just to start with Jack, but Chloë adamantly insisted on being included in the fun. I made sure that they realized that, though we will do lots of fun things, I will expect hard work out of them, and they agreed readily. Sophia wanted to do it too, but frankly, I'm not comfortable with my ability to get her to read. I'm going to work on it, though, and hey, if she's reading before school starts, then maybe things will change. I started off entirely nervous about the prospect, but now most of those nerves have changed to excitement. We CAN do this, and it'll be great!!

☼

On Tuesday, Rob took the kids to Chloë's ballet class, while I attended the PTA Volunteer Banquet at the school. I did a bunch of volunteer work over the year (and might even do more), but I never log my hours, so I didn't win a volunteer-of-the-month prize or anything. It doesn't bother me - I don't do it for the rewards - but after seeing some of he goodies, I'm thinking maybe I will start logging when I'm in!

Also for the banquet, I wore a dress! I haven't worn a dress in gosh, I don't know how long. It was a black, floor-length, strappy dress. I wore a shawl around it, which Rob said made me entirely too formal for the function, but I didn't care because it covered my bra straps. I can do exposed bra straps with an informal tank top or something, but not dressed up. Tacky! Anyway, a lot of people came up to me and said how good I looked, and how proud they were of me on the weight loss (173 lbs so far). I was a bit overdressed and uncomfortable, but I do think I looked good in the dress, and I will wear it again. Soon. (I should knit myself a little bolero or something, though, because the shawl was a pain in the butt to keep positioned right. Or maybe just get a shawl pin??)

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As for today, the plans are: two childcare center mystery shops, a pancake restaurant shop (I'm hoping Rob will go with me, but I may have to go alone if he's tired from working all night), a party store shop, the Parents of Gifted Children workshop at the school, and possibly volunteering at Bingo night at the school. No, movie night. I have it wrong in my calendar; pretty sure it's movie night. I like doing the concessions - the money and popcorn part - so hopefully I can get that job again.

☼

Saturday is going to be crazy, too. First thing in the morning, I'm supposed to be doing a 5K-run/1-mile walk (I'm doing the walk, not ready for the 5K yet) in support of our local Girl Scout council. It's my first-ever such event, and I'm excited about it. Plus, I paid $15 to enter, so I really do want to go.

Unfortunately, just a little while after I'm supposed to be there, Chloë is supposed to be checking in for the Girl Scouts' Powderpuff Derby. Not sure how that is going to work, since we don't have enough carseats for all three kids in both cars. I wanted them to come watch me "race," and I also want to watch Chloë's car race (it's not made yet, or I'd post a picture), so that stinks.

After the races, I'm hoping Rob will take the kids to the craft make-and-take at Michaels. I'd take them, but since I think it's a Mother's Day project, I want to wait and be surprised!  I mean, it really doesn't do to help make your own present, does it?

And then in the afternoon, I'll be going to my first support group meeting for weight loss surgery patients. I have to laugh, because they're holding it at Jason's Deli. I mean, why not have it at the park or somewhere where food isn't the focus? I'll probably just get a drink...

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Sunday, we'll have a little bit of deja vu, because Sophia is going to a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese for the little girl who came to her birthday party at CEC this past Sunday! And I know, I know, I still haven't posted pictures of that, but I have over 100 to whittle down! Maybe I'll just throw the whole lot up on Facebook and call it a day. Maybe. Did I mention that one of Sophie's teachers came to her birthday party? That was pretty cool; we've never had that happen. She let me take her picture, but she insisted it not show up online anywhere!

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I haven't been keeping track of cute kid quotes lately (bad Mama, I know), so that's it for me. Long enough though, isn't it?? Hope you all have a great weekend.

Fin.

Post-Script

...regarding the whole ADHD thing, I forgot to mention: the doctor where Chloë and soon Jack go the therapy is Dr. Charles Parker, a renowned expert in the study of ADHD, medications and children (well, the collision of those three things, I guess), and I am getting a referral to him from Dr. A. I would feel much more comfortable with them in his care, and a therapist in the same office monitoring their behavioral changes and having immediate access to that doctor. Hopefully, Tricare will approve this without a hitch. If not, I'll fight for it!

Fin.

Decisions, Decisions

Hopefully I will get a post up about Sophia's birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese on Sunday, but for this post, I'm going to focus on all three kids' follow-up appointments with Dr. A. this afternoon at the Naval hospital.

Rob and I both went, so that he could corral the children in the waiting room when they weren't being seen in the exam room, while I talked to the young doc.

Sophia's blood pressure was again higher than Jack and Chloë's today, when taken with the automated cuff. After three bouts of pre-eclampsia, I don't put a whole lot of stock in those machines and much prefer a manual reading, so I was glad when Dr A chose to do one, and it came out much lower.

So let's talk about Sophia first. She's fine, fine, fine. Even the higher BP readings were on the high side of normal, which is still normal, so that's good. Her urine and blood test results were in, and the frequent drinking and peeing seems to be a behavior issue - which is not to say that it's a problem for us, because it's not - rather than a medical one. There is no physiological cause for her excessive thirst and urine output. Everything is normal. So, yay. One less worry.

On to Jack.

The screenings that both his teacher and I filled out on him were both very positive for ADHD. Not surprisingly, he was strongly positive for both of us on the "inattention" side of things, but to my surprise, the teacher also rated him strongly for the "hyperactivity" set of questions, as well. So it would appear that he is a classic case of ADHD, and treatment is advised.

Also, based on my answers, the doctor said he has ODD, or Oppositional Defiant Disorder, which can sometimes masquerade as ADHD. You can read more about that at the link, but here's how I think he matches up with the symptoms listed there:

• Frequent temper tantrums  - Semi
• Excessive arguing with adults - Often
• Often questioning rules - Always
• Active defiance and refusal to comply with adult requests and rules - Often
• Deliberate attempts to annoy or upset people - Often (his sisters esp.)
• Blaming others for his or her mistakes or misbehavior - Constantly
• Often being touchy or easily annoyed by others - Always
• Frequent anger and resentment - Often
• Mean and hateful talking when upset - Usually
• Spiteful attitude and revenge seeking - Eh, not sure about that one

Basically, he's not a mean, nasty kid, and I'm not worried him being a socio- or psychopath down the road (although he does frequently wet the bed). I've always just dismissed the above things as being Jack's personality, and we've dealt with it as such. It never occurred to me it might be an actual disorder! Behavioral modification therapy was recommended for this, so I'm going to try to get him in at the same place, if not with the same therapist, where Chloë is going for her "Adjustment Disorder." It will be interesting to see if there is any change in his attitude and behavior.

Which is not to say that he's Oscar the Grouch 100% of the time, either. He can be the sweetest, most loving and affectionate kid out of the three of them, but those moods are few and far between. He can be funny and fun, he can laugh and play, and all of that... but the grouchy grumpies are what I see most of the time. I have always thought of him as our most difficult, challenging child. Hopefully with the appropriate therapies, we can help him become a happier little guy.

Back to the ADHD, which often presents along with ODD and has some of the same symptoms... First, I was very relieved when Dr. A. validated my concerns about medicating him, and also agreed that homeschooling and NOT medicating was a viable, valid option. I am about 98% sure I am going to pull him out of public school and homeschool him for the '10-'11 school year. I haven't looked into it much at ALL yet, so I haven't registered this plan with the city/state/planet or done too much research into what resources we'll use.

It just seems to me that if this is not a medically harmful condition, and that if the medication IS potentially harmful (and I think we can all agree that it is, and there are some scary things out there on the interwebs), then we should consider all available options. It also seems to me that if the reason to medicate is so that he can behave properly in a traditional school environment, then perhaps a traditional school environment is not ideal for my son.

Yes, I am aware that at some point he will need to learn to behave appropriately in a traditional environment. But you know what? He is not out of control, and his behavior is not so 'bad' that we are exasperated parents. The problem, at least with inattentiveness, is at school, much more so than at home. If anything, his ability to sit down and focus on getting his homework done has improved over the months, without medication or any other "treatment" than giving him guided, one-on-one attention. And really, his homework consists entirely of doing worksheets. Honestly, I think in this day and age, we have better educational tools than handing out an endless stack of fecking worksheets. I loathe the worksheets! There has got to be a better way. {End rant.}

This is a child who is frequently taken out to restaurants, and I'm not talking about McDonald's. I'm talking fine dining establishments, occasionally where the other diners and servers are surprised to see a child in attendance. We would not and could not do this if his behaviors (ODD, hyperactivity, etc.) were so severe that I was rushing to the pharmacy for an immediate solution.

I am also aware that ADHD can continue into adulthood. (Exhibit one, his father, who is self-diagnosed as having it.) However, maybe with effective psychotherapy in childhood, he can learn coping skills and mechanisms for getting himself focused and on-track. Maybe not; I don't really know. This is all just one big experiment, isn't it?

However, my number one goal as a parent is to meet my children's needs and do what is best for them. So after reading the above, it may surprise you that I agreed to start him on a trial of Adderall. Originally, the plan was to put him on Concerta, but since he can't swallow pills and Concerta can't be broken open, the doc put him on Adderall instead. Dr. A. described it as the "Coke vs. Pepsi of ADHD medication."

Why did I accept this prescription? I am asking myself that after doing more reading on the 'net. However, he still has to get through the rest of the '09-'10 school year (I am not quite ready to just pull him out and start teaching him TODAY; I feel unprepared at best), and apparently the problem is quite severe. Dr. A was NOT trying to convince me to have him take it; he very much left it up to me to decide. (I told him that I would talk it over with my husband, who was outside in the waiting area with the kids, before filling the prescription. However, Rob didn't question my decision at all, as he often doesn't on these types of matters, and I'm not going to address here whether that fact bothers me at all...)

Hours later, I can't even say for sure what it was that made me say, "Okay, give me the prescription." I was exhausted, for one thing, and for another, I forgot my pen and notebook. I always take notes, but this time I didn't. Couldn't. And yes, I cried. Not really, but the tears definitely welled up in my eyes. I want to do what is best for my child. I want to make the right decisions for him. I want to get him all the help he needs.

Thankfully, there is no reason we could not IMMEDIATELY stop the medication if there were adverse side effects, and those are numerous. Dr. A. said there were no withdrawal symptoms from going off rapidly, although it was not a good idea to go off-and-on, on-and-off, but I have no plans to do so. We will start at the lowest possible dose, and I will email Doc in a week or two to let him know how things are going. We are going to plan the trial for a month and then follow up again with Dr. A.

One side effect almost every child gets is loss of appetite. The plan is to give the kids (plural, since Chloë will be going on it, too, but I'll get to that) a huge breakfast, then give the medicine. I can break up the pill and mix it with applesauce - or ice cream, since they need the fat and calories anyway. We'll plan for a small lunch, and then by the time dinner rolls around, the appetite-supression should have worn off. If not, a small dinner followed by a good snack before bed.

If, after being on the smallest dose, we notice that there are no real side effects, and also it's not doing anything for him/them, we will up the dose to the next level. If at the next dose, the same thing, then we'll go up again. If ever we notice adverse effects, we go back down. If ever there are really bad side effects, and/or the medication just isn't effective, we will stop immediately and be done with it.

I'm VERY nervous about this medication. I can't believe I am about to give psychotropic drugs to my 7- and 8-year-old, teeny-tiny children. If you're the praying sort, maybe you can say one for us. If not, please don't tell me about your second cousin's next-door-neighbor's wife's youngest sister who died after taking one dose. I don't need to hear any more stories like that right now!

On to Chloë.

She is borderline positive for ADHD. Nothing on the hyperactivity side, much more positive on the inattention side. She is a bit of a worrier, a bit anxious, which can also masquerade as ADHD, which brought up the subject of her being in therapy. I apologized to Dr. A. for not bringing it up at her check-up last month, but I'd plum forgotten. After discussing what's going on with her (frequent tantrums and emotionality more suitable to a two-year-old being the salient feature), he agreed that it was appropriate, and he would have referred her for psychotherapy himself. He was glad we took that action.

As for the ADHD, after seeing her scores, he discussed her with the neurodevelopment ADHD specialist on the hospital campus, and Strattera was suggested as the drug of choice. It's less effective, but also less... risky, I guess? It's just LESS, all-around, and is not a stimulant like the other meds. However, since she also cannot take pills and Strattera can't be opened, Doc also suggested the low-dose Adderall. Eek.

I don't know what it is, but I feel somewhat less strongly about NOT medicating Chloë than I do for Jack, even though his problem presents as far more severe. Maybe it's because she's been in school longer, and her teachers (including dance teachers) have been complaining about her lack of ability to focus, etc. since kindergarten, I don't know, but I feel less scared and unsure about the ADD diagnosis and medication where she is concerned. The "what should I do?" conversation with the doc was much shorter than it was concerning Jack, that's for sure. I would have preferred the Strattera, but she just can't swallow the pills yet. So. We will try the Adderall for her, too.

Between the two kids with ADHD, the ODD, and the Adjustment Disorder, I am having another attack of the "where did I go wrong" yucky feelings. Reassurance would be a big help.

And also, between that stuff and the fact that now all three kids need glasses (they're all far-sighted to some degree, like their father, although Chloë's is the most severe. She also has a pretty bad astigmatism thang goin' on), I'm more grateful than ever to have good health insurance. Being in the military isn't SO bad, I guess. ;) I just wish it covered 100% of the braces that all 3 kids will likely need, starting soon with Chloë's orthodontia, too!

Time to hit "publish."

Fin.