I can't say exactly what that's done to me as far as my hormones go, but my moods and emotions have been all over the map. I've been happy, sad, angry and everywhere in between.
I was just talking to my therapist about scream therapy and how, in the year after our son died, I felt like I needed to scream, and if I could just get that out, I would feel so much better. But I couldn't.
Last night, all the frustrations of my situation got to me at once (the pain, the shuffling little steps I have to take to get around, the seeming way my husband is doing nothing right, not being able to drive, not being able to fold the laundry that is piling up because I can't keep bending over or lift the basket onto the bed, and so on...) and I thought I would lose my mind.
Instead, I started yelling. Well, it wasn't really a yell. Or a scream. I don't know what that noise was I was making. It was rather alarming and annoying, but it was the middle of the night, so the only person who heard me was my husband, and even he slept through half of it.
All the tears and the emotions kept pouring out of me, as I continued to shout it out. And, finally, when I was finished, I felt relaxed. So much better. I really just needed to do that, I guess.
Seal said it best: You're never gonna survive, unless you get a little crazy.
Hey, it worked for me.
P.S. It's totally cracking me up that no one has replied to this!! Hey, I admitted to the 'crazy' part!