Dearly Beloved, Parte Uno

Dear Self,

Please remember to put clothes on the children - especially shirts on the girls - when you want to take pictures of them to post here on le blahg, so you don't have to do this in Paint:

 

Also, it's probably a good idea to start thinking about switching out the Summer clothes for Fall, now that it's almost October. Just sayin'.

Love,

Me

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Dear Navy,

I LOVE this uniform on the hubs. Thanks for making the switch.

Signed,

Amorous Housewife

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Dear Rob,

Wear the hat when you come home, too. I promise you won't regret it.

Love,

Heh Heh Heh

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Dear ALL Men,

Was I invisible when I had an extra 200 pounds on me? Because I swear you all didn't run to open doors for me like you do now. I mean, I appreciate it and all, but chivalry doesn't stop over a certain BMI, you know?

Sincerely,

Former Chubster

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Dear New Therapist,

I can tell you're seriously great at what you do and all, but can you try to be a little less judgy in the process? It's not exactly what I'm going for.

Also, would it kill you to crack a smile when I'm making my stupid jokes, once in a while? I promise I don't really duct tape my children to their beds at night.

And one more thing: Seriously? You got stuck in traffic three out of the last three times I had an appointment with you? My time is valuable, also. Maybe leave earlier? Just a thought.

From,

The One Who Cries Nonstop

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Dear Beautiful Progeny o' Mine,

Honestly, we don't care WHAT you eat, just please, for the love of God, EAT IT IN THE KITCHEN or don't complain when you see bugs in your room!!!!

Love,

Exasperated Mom & Pop

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I think this may become a new feature for me. I've been writing lots of mental notes lately.

Fin.